http://desert-trees.com/1639/what-is-my-conflict-in-this-story/ Thu, 07 Jan 2010 17:57:17 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 http://desert-trees.com/1639/what-is-my-conflict-in-this-story/comment-page-1/#comment-689 Sexy Sadie Sat, 02 Jan 2010 03:12:18 +0000 http://desert-trees.com/1639/what-is-my-conflict-in-this-story/#comment-689 It vibrated, almost happily, as if it knew she was thrilled to be here. That line made me cringe. Don't describe Elizabeth too much- do we care what her hair is like? Don't feel you have to force description in. It vibrated, almost happily, as if it knew she was thrilled to be here.
That line made me cringe.
Don’t describe Elizabeth too much- do we care what her hair is like? Don’t feel you have to force description in.

]]> http://desert-trees.com/1639/what-is-my-conflict-in-this-story/comment-page-1/#comment-688 Ed Atun Sat, 02 Jan 2010 02:31:33 +0000 http://desert-trees.com/1639/what-is-my-conflict-in-this-story/#comment-688 Sounds like an interesting story, but I don't really see the conflict in it, yet. Not unless you count her search for her grandfather's grave as one and being led to it by the hat as a resolution. But I think if you develop it more, you will find your conflict. I have to point out an inconsistency or confusion. At one point, you say he is her great grandfather, then at another point, you say he and his wife had her mother making him her grandfather. Sounds like an interesting story, but I don’t really see the conflict in it, yet. Not unless you count her search for her grandfather’s grave as one and being led to it by the hat as a resolution.
But I think if you develop it more, you will find your conflict.
I have to point out an inconsistency or confusion. At one point, you say he is her great grandfather, then at another point, you say he and his wife had her mother making him her grandfather.

]]> http://desert-trees.com/1639/what-is-my-conflict-in-this-story/comment-page-1/#comment-687 shytown Sat, 02 Jan 2010 01:40:57 +0000 http://desert-trees.com/1639/what-is-my-conflict-in-this-story/#comment-687 The conflict is inside Elizabeth. She is being tugged by the real world and the spirit world.. The conflict is inside Elizabeth. She is being tugged by the real world and the spirit world..

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